This finale is open late, and so are Jack and Ronald!! A midnight booty call brings us to climax. Will true feelings be revealed at last? Will we find out more about the custody arrangement for Jack Jr.? There's only one way to find out.

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[FYI: This episode was originally posted as Quickie 59 before we realized it was a multi-part story that became Season 29!] Grab your horsey sauce and dig into part three of our fast food f*ckery. The Happy Meal Ending involves a threesome with characters you'll never expect (and some new ones!) Wet wipes optional.

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Heated Rivalry WISHES it had the Wendy's mascot dressing up as Cupid to help Ronald McDonald and Jack from Jack in the Box fall in love. Yes, it's part two of the greatest pairing since burger and fries—complete with a lot of clown nose honking in bed. Happy Valentine's Day!

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Imagine the enemies-to-lovers trope, but flash-fried and supersized. That's the cool treat (and hot eats) you're in for with this story. We go back to the beginning of the Ronald / Wendy / Jack (in the box) Arby saga in Part 1 of the 4-part series and discover how it all began (and happy (meal) ended), and just like a late-night quarter pounder, it does NOT disappoint. 

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